I’ve always kinda hated the term “dad bod”. I don’t know when I first heard it but it was at some point in adulthood well before any realistic notion of me being a dad existed. I doubt there’s any exactly shared definition of “dad bod” but Urban Dictionary sums it up poignantly:

“Dad bod” is a male body type that is best described as “softly round.” It’s built upon the theory that once a man has found a mate and fathered a child, he doesn’t need to worry about maintaining a sculpted physique.

If human bodies were cuts of meat, the dad bod would skew more marbled rib eye than filet mignon; or, if human bodies were sea mammals dad bod would be more like a grazing manatee than a speedy dolphin. The dad bod is more mudslide than mountain, more soft serve than sorbet, more sad trombone than clarinet, more mashed potato than skinny fry. The dad bod is built for comfort.

Part of what I don’t like is that it goes against the picture I had as a kid of my Dad. Which is notable because he met the definition above pretty well. But when I was a child and he was “Dad”, before I became older and realized he was just another guy who also happened to be my Dad, he was a god damned super hero in my eyes. The stuff of legends. How dare he be described as “more mudslide than mountain”.

But the other big part of it that I don’t like is how it now fairly accurately describes me at this moment.

So this is my documentation of rebuilding my dad bod. Hence the title: Dad Bod 3000.

I know my little guy will love me no matter what aquatic mammal I resemble. But its not really about that anyway. Part of its vanity: I don’t like way I look. Part of its frugalness: I already paid for clothes that now don’t fit. Part of it’s insecurity: my main form of exercise at the moment is swimming and spare tires and speedos are an awful pairing.

But I also want to be able to role model to him certain things: taking care of your health, enjoying activities, persevering, the power of habits, and crucially: that it’s possible to get back on track even if you’ve lost focus for a while.